Monday, March 19, 2012

I am who I am :')

我并没有改变
我还是我

有时 只是累了
有时 只是不想表明
有时 只想掩饰些东西
有时 只想没烦恼
有时 只想没理由的开心

大家都认为我过得很好
吃 喝 玩 乐
天天都很同学一起玩闹
当玩闹之前 我们努力 我们奋斗了不少
天天去哪里玩 哪里享受 发掘美食
只想把快乐代替郁闷 只想把很多很多的快乐掩饰好所有一切

每天很颠的过生活 qisin婆一样玩闹 去这去那
朋友 觉得我很好 我变了 变得很多
只想忘记 只想放下 一些我早该放下的东西
但却至今 我放不下的那些大家以为我一直都很好

我必须要独立坚强
朋友以为每次有同学相伴
同学以为每次有朋友家人相伴
亲戚以为每次有同学朋友相伴
家人以为每次有朋友同学亲戚相伴
无忧无虑
难道凡事都只看表面吗

但我也只不过都是一个人做每件事
害怕不喜欢不习惯一个人 的以前那位小姐
从去年开始 她必须不害怕适应习惯一个人 独立
不开心也必须开心笑着过每一天 让大家知道她很好
而现在她的确独自过这她必须过的生活
不依靠 没相伴也一样去完成

不明白 却被质疑
有时 的确伪装得累了
当你被最亲的 最关心的 朋友或家人那样的质疑
但还是必须以一个人伪装下去 对啊 我就是这样过这生活
有时真的还是会想要找个人 依靠 得到他的安慰安抚
只是想要自己就那样的快乐
然后不再去想 不再转牛角尖
让快乐 让自己不烦恼 放下早该放的 放下必须放的 看开必须看开的
就这样一直的大笑 一直的快乐 抹去那些不该存在的郁闷
那样的颠那样的疯那样的sanpat的女生
所以现在我才可以像大家认为的卢芊颖
每天玩闹 每天快乐 不正劲

我相信 我可以
我还可以继续那样的快乐让自己好过
直到 能办到 拿得起放得下
完完全全的放下所有 而不是一直想这样逃避着掩饰着
以前的她不会是再隐性的了 但她放下看透

加油!
我还是以前的卢芊颖!:)

Nice song which accompany me whole night :)

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Memories of 2011

Happy New Year 2012!! :)
Such a long time didn't come and update because...quite busy and I had forgot my password!! >.<
Here I come! Just wanna talk about my story of lovely training!

My 2011 life really sucks...bad to the MAX but Ending with such a memorable internship and those lovely fellow! Love them!

10 of US, different classes even don't know each other b4 the internship be paired, but...
We had fun We had joy All in the Grand Millennium Kuala Lumpur! :)
I cherish the moment we together! GMKL & Genting trip! Unforgettable memories! :')
Love you guys!<3

I learnt lots when I am training.
How fake of people How reality of people...I aware from there.
By the way, some of them treat me nice! I love them!
And I know quite lot friends, some of them same with me also, as a Trainee :)
They are from Swiss, France, KDU, Taylor's etc
I was go through 5 outlets in 3 months and with different position different kind of nice uniform also XD

Banquet~ boring boring boring but learnt lots about hotel there and chat with those clients, speaker :) This was the place I start met new friends from many departments since it is only foreigner's worker and no girl here :(
Mill cafe~ The only department will appear the idea of "1 Malaysia" cause that was different type of ethnic staff here. Wiping wiping WIPING, that was what I did the first week there even almost cry! How the Excellent Girl Captain Treat me! but luckily another captain save me so my 2nd & 3rd will be okay but busy busy busy when breakfast time. *Coffee Tea Coffee tea Coffee Tea Chocolate >.< Host, ask for room no. and tick and assist them to their place. You will crazy when all the guests come tgt! And even get scold of the boss there. Seriously, I don't like work with him but I enjoy the time with him when out of work :) That was some of the staff there care me lots!*appreciate And, this was the department I was fainted and...Famous >.<
LaiChingYuen~ Spilt shift!! But enjoy it caused we had fun when break time...We hang out to search for delicious food :) This was the place I get to know how scary of people's mouth. I feel disappointed of auntie. I had look down of her. I take back my respect from her! Aunties always thought they were old and had a lot of experience than us, STUBBORN to the MAX! Sometimes really wrong but don't want take the advice from us just because they thought they had many experiences than us and eat more rice than us! but, that is a nice staff there. When I said "Hungry", after free...I had food at the Kitchen! He will get me my favourite, cake :) He is the only nice staff here but he was left!*other trainee were miss him lots since he was really good staff and the only helpful hand here . Sometime will be late to finish work then they won't send me home. At here, we always curi makan XD The food really nice XD But a noob boss here, always make the thing up side down! Don't know how to arrange thing! Even trainees also better than him! Like to talk bullshit but don't know how to do the things well! No comment for him =.= But, I am the lucky one to have a chance as the waitress of Malaysia International Gourment Festival. The reviewers were from Brazil and under Dato' Steve. They were coming to our restaurant to giving marks. We were the 28 out of 30 of 5 stars restaurant to welcome them! Nice experience! ^^
Housekeeping~ Tired but Nice!!! I was really enjoy when I was as a Room attendant even It really TIRED! But the kakakx2 abangx2 there really nice. Clean clean clean and time pass soon! I prefer afternoon shift since I was saw them take care of each other help each other finish work together and waiting back home time together also! Even will have 10 room attendants in a room XD I love Mocha style room and GM's dog yume :) As a Floor supervisor like take a slim down course XD I need to go up and down to find my mentor abang Amin XD He always lost and just leave me in the room since he dont wish I too tired >.< I was fall in sleep in the room. But he is Nice! :) I not really like Public area...not much thing i can learn. Only wash toilet :(
Front Office~ Spend 1 month here. The department I learnt lots and make a lot of friends :) I was as a Guest Service Officer :) I need to assis VIP VVIP VVVIP guests and stand by at lobby to assist everyone who need me XD It is quite enjoy. The first week I am totally stress cause I am the one first communicate with guests and need to assist them for check in/out but I have no idea. Only 4 counter there and the queue was become long and long and the guest has no more patient, this time I really don't know what I should do Stress to the MAX. I even as a Concierge cause I need to assist all the guests and they will ask me lots of Q such as what is the nice food in Malayssa where is here and there etc. Bell girl also although I am under GSO cause I need to help all the guest who has facing problem. Business Centre also XD Unfortunately, I cant do check in/out cause I am a trainee only but the GSA there treat me nice even teach me what I wish to know. Suddenly I be transfer to Health Club. XD SPA, Gym, Swimming pool and tennis court. I need to light up all the candle, place the aroma, test the PH & Chlorine. I need to go up and down to take care all of it. Sometime will chit chat with a la carte staff and the manager. The manager always be kacau by me since their office just in front of me XD He is smart also ccause he can guess what I think XD I enjoy as a GSO also! :)

Some of the department I din go through but you guys teach me lots, care me & we have fun! Thanks and glad to know you guys, Linen who always care me once he meet me, Steward supervisor, abang-abang of Room service, Chef of Mill, Chef Tan who give me advice, Mr. Floyd who always give me the headache questions & share me his experience, Mr. Maniaam, Mr. Phabra who always be kacau by me share me experience save me when I am really hungry and make me confused with Mr. Bala a nice guy when they together at the first time I met them, All the security, Reservation department, Mr. Basheer, Mr. Royston who give me the chance to join GMKL etc :)

Time flies.....16th December 2011, I had finished my training. I miss them lots! I miss the staff there!  I miss the trainee/ part timer from different college and country! I enjoy the time with them! I was glad to meet them to know them! I appreciate what they give me! I appreciate all the moment we had fun! I am glad I was joining this big family! :') Now, Everything just let it be a Nice Sweet Warmth Happy Memories!
How are you guys....? Just wanna tell you guys, Thanks & I miss you!<3

And yet, ended this post with the song sang in GMKL, You can count on me! :)

10 of us!<3

I am Gemini :)

双子座常常因为年少轻狂而和真爱擦身而过,
在年轻的时候双子座的人常常会为了赌一口气而装做不在乎,
明明心里很在乎,心里都已经在淌血了,
可是还是装出一 副不在乎的样子,也不好意思去追,
因此这一点是双子座心中永远的痛,
其实他也很恨自己为什么他不能克服自己心里的阴暗面,
可是他就是做不到,
常常眼睁睁的 看着自己最爱的人走掉。


心口不一,原因肯定不只一个,
也许是为了保护自己脆弱的心,
也或许不愿别人想太多,
令本来简单的事变复杂,
而这却是双子讨厌自己的地方,
明明心里爱着,却不知为何总是说着冰冷的话语拒绝,
明明不想放手,却不知为何果断的答应,
是太爱还是太恨,
是陷的太深还是从未真正进入,
很多时候这都已经不再重要,
因为谎言伤害的不只是对方,还有自己。

Friday, August 5, 2011

Because I am Girl - Kiss *Touch


I just can't understand the hearts of men
They tell you they want you and then they leave you
This is the first time, you're special
I believed those words and I was so happy


You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

I heard that if you give up things too easily
To a man, he will get bored with you
I don't think this is wrong
A girl says that she will never be fooled again
But she will fall in love again

You should have told me you didn't like me any more
But I couldn't see that and you just rushed me
Although I will curse you I'll still miss you
Since I am a girl, to whom love is everything

[Narration]
Hey babe
The pain
It's not enough to describe how i feel
We were so happy together
But I know now
I've been blind
You told me that you'd never let me down
Whenever I needed you you'd always be here
I can forgive but I cant forget
Even though you hurt me
I still love you
I still love you

Don't take advantage of a girl's willingness to do anything for love
And her caring instinct
I didn't know that to be born as a girl and to be loved was so hard
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Since i am a girl, to whom love is everything
Although i will curse you i'll still miss you
Since i am a girl, to whom love is everything

Narration (Guy, only in the music video)
There's someone I'm in love with...
Although I can't be with her now...
I'm still in love with her...

Monday, July 11, 2011

I hope I'm strong T^T

Can't sleep well
Can't do well
Can't relax well
Can't handle well

I thought I can be strong as what I think
I thought I will be fine soon
I thought I can be happy
I thought I will smile

but.....I'm failed
I'm failed to do that

I'm totally failed
I'm depressed
I'm stress
I can't stand it


I need someone
I need hug


I wanna leave
I wanna back

Do not know why......
My tear was dropped after I heard someone voice who closet with me

I do not know how to face problem
I do not want to be a emo girl
It is tired =[

I'm really failed
I'm really useless
I just will keep silence

I miss mum
I miss dad
I miss them
I miss my old good friend
I miss last time
I miss BP
I miss everyone
I miss you


Everything I just can keep in heart cry to abreact
I......don not know what should I do T_T

Friday, June 17, 2011

-----

其实,我累了.­

其实,一直没有人能够懂我,我习惯了假装坚强,习惯了一个人面对所有....­

我不知道自己到底想怎样­

有时候­

我可以很开心的和每个人说话,可以很放肆的.­

可是没有人知道那不过是伪装,很刻意的伪装­

我可以让自己很快乐很快乐­

可是却找不到快乐的源泉,只会让自己傻笑­

不习惯把事跟很多人说,因为我不习惯别人用可怜的眼光看我­

其实,我很珍惜身边的人,只是生活的压力让我善于遗忘,把那些记忆通通遗忘­

我以为遗忘可以让自己快乐起来...­

可我感觉到的却是更多的寂寞­

黑夜来袭,周围的空气很躁.....­

一个人爬在窗前,对着窗外的人群发呆.....­

也不知道自己在想什么..­想很多很多,想到头痛,想到心痛。

怀念过去?仅此而已..­?

其实我很累了,真的想放下所有...­

何时发现我不 在爱写日记,即使心里有好多事,我也宁愿憋在心里,不是我不愿说,而是我疲惫了...­

挂了FB 却不上线­

挂了FB 却不聊天­

只是反复着打开空间,关闭空间..­.

何时­

我不再喜欢追逐打闹,却很想和以前一样活蹦乱跳­

何时­

我沉默的不再爱说话.却很想找个知心朋友向她倾诉所有...

我喜欢在很静很静的黑夜,又害怕静静的黑夜。关了灯让寂寞把我包裹,却又害怕黑暗...­

我也会偶而想和朋友聚聚..­.

或开心­

或失望

我也会偶尔找寻发泄的方法­

或有效­

或更伤­

偶而也会寂寞的拿起手机翻开通信录,一遍一遍的......却不知道该打给谁......

当自己无助的时候,会想到,该怎么办 到底怎么办,去和朋友说?

又能和谁说。

亲爱的自己、醒醒吧。学会去承受。学会去面对现实吧.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Enjoy

fuiyohhhhh~
Yesterday go Hok Lok pasar malam and Look Out Point
A Fun Trip XD
We Eat Eat Eat
We Drink Drink Drink
We Walk Walk Walk
because of that was very squeeze and crowded
we keep move forward non stop
we just walk as fast as we can by lie up a row
squeeze inside the ppl btw ppl
That was fun XD
This was my housemate's friend idea!
His named as ah Keong so what he do also very "keong" one XD
and without him, we can't reached our destination also

after HokLok, we go Look Out Point
The view of whole KL
One word to describe it "SPETACULAR"!!
but the destination is high enough
It is a hill
although we were by car but we still need to walk also
The staircase......TIRED>.<
but worth it!

and housemate's friend's mum cooking is BEST!
after we back from Look Out Point
we enjoy his mum cook
super nice
chao la la & huang jiu ji
I love her mum much!
The dishes really nice~
Like Like Like XD

crazy wif siao zha bor<3
7人行 XD